Miss Independent

There is this song that I love listening and singing to...it's just so catchy. but, it's terrible. "Miss Independent" by Neyo.

I don't really understand why this song was written. Is it to give women the idea that men exist who like girls that are independent and strong? I can't help think it has ulterior motives. It's taking for granted the desire of many to be desired. And it's like the writers thought, "how do we seduce women in a new way, or how do we appeal to a new audience--the types who work, go to school and who have real lives independent of drama and attachment....I know, glorify the ones who put their emphasis on figuring out their lives and careers rather than "finding the one," the ones that are "independent."

And what does independence look like? Oh, paying bills on time, paying off her own car, not needing "a man" all while having her nails done and looking nice! OMG do these women really exist?!?! dang. from the looks of the video I guess so? Men gotta have one of these Miss Independents and women have to be one of these Miss Independents.

But isn't it obvious that by reducing the very subject of the song (Miss Independent) to someone nameless, something other than encouragement of female empowerment is being communicated? Perhaps something that it is shallow and empty, twisted and confused? Or do we really need to see the music video to further see the complications and contradictions of this song?

Well, it's quite amusing to me so here it is, Miss Independent.....not

Seriously?!? Beautiful women working under him in an office? What more can a "man" (the stereotypical man and his culturally prescribed desires are frankly disgusting) want, like a million secretaries?? GAH! Everytime it tries to show the woman as "Independent" the point is immediately perverted by shots of her open backed shirt, her midriff bearing bra-like shirt, cleavage showing dress, and sexually charged dancing. So, how to get ahead in this male society is to 1. be in the corporate business world (plah plah plah) 2. to show off what "you got" while acting aloof to male attention. 3. wear tons of makeup 4. dance up on a guy (yeah...I know a stretch but what were they thinking?!)


Now the rest that I'm going to say should maybe be elaborated on in a different post, but all I'll say now is that Miss Independent is just as dependent as the rest of us. However, the kind of independence they are portraying is warped and damaging, especially since it's claiming to be one thing while really being another thing. It's communicating, "dress sexy so that you'll advance in the business world, land a good job, and get a guy on the side." It all seems dehumanizing.

But all this to say, I don't really think it's that important to be independent (gasp).

I am dependent on Seth as he is on me. I think this can only be a good thing. Because, together, we are trying to depend on something greater than the both of us....more on this later.

SO to wrap up this post, I want to say it's FOUR MONTHS UNTIL WE'RE MARRIED.

And I am getting so excited. I really like to look at old pictures from the starts of our relationship. So I'll probably start throwing them in randomly.

Like this one from my cousin's April 2009 wedding at the Grand Hyatt, in Denver. We were kind of lost and found doors with mirrors on them, obviously. I love Seth's hair long.

Happy Friday!

has anyone had a nine minute first dance?

I reference this song alot. My Dove, My Lamb by Phosphorescent could be my favorite song. Seth put it on a birthday cd for me last year and it still gives me shivers and smiles. It's one of those songs you could listen to as you fell asleep only to have your favorite dreams.

So, here it is: (I'd suggest getting the actual song somewhere...itunes?)

I remember evenings when my dad would sing
Hiding in the hallways, I am listening
Keeping still my body until it's borne aloft
Her hair is soft her breath is soft and her name is soft
And gather me completely in her sighing hands
My dove my dove my lamb

Born with ocean thunder underneath our veins
Lonelier than cows left standing in the rain
Holy when our weight into the waves is tossed
Though ships get lost and fish get lost and names get lost
She will wait to greet me where it meets dry land
My dove my dove my lamb

So. Careful of that language some words are stones
They'll lead you out from town and leave you all alone
Past the mirrored diamond mares that run all night
Where camptown ladies sing that song aw come aw wry
But lo they sing it sweetly so I'll understand
My dove my dove my lamb

Though my sight be near and my way be long
Though the light I chase be disappeared by dawn
I have seen her standing on the roofs at night
I have seen her silver figure bathed and bright
And I have seen her sleeping in the cold white sand
My dove my dove my lamb

So even in these cities where she's haunting me
Even when my weariness is wanting me
Even when my wickednesses want to breathe
Even in these dirty clubs counting 1-2-3
I will keep a singing til I no more can
My dove my dove my lamb

And later if I'm better I'll be born again
I'll pull my newborn body from the thorns and limbs
Finding with my fingers where they've torn the page
From some ancient book all gold and worn from age
And writ upon it neatly though in trembling hand
My dove my dove my lamb

Then later in the evening I hear trumpets ring
I stretch out in the dark and I am listening
Studying the sadness in your perfect limbs
Move them under mine until they learn to blend
And I will keep repeating til they understand
My dove my dove my lamb

It's just a great love song. I especially like the last three stanzas with their themes of weariness and redemption and transformation, etc.

So, goodnight. And to my Sethy: my dove, my dove, my lamb.

Sunday Morning

This might be my favorite Sunday morning I've had in a while. It's something about Sundays that gets me anxious and irritated; it's probably because I'm anticipating the Monday ahead.

But not today. I woke up relatively early, 7:30am, which is always a good thing because it means I can fill the time before I go to church with good things. Instead of just "getting ready," I am at this very moment, eating Vanilla Island Kashi cereal, drinking really good, smokey, dark, coffee, listening to Feist, and smelling the starts of my summer squash casserole sizzle in the frying pan.

Seth and I are going to church at Christ our Hope Anglican Church as of late, and today there is a potluck, hence the casserole. But this is what I like: making food, taking my time in the morning, and getting an early start.

I feel like I'm growing...up?

Even last night we went car shopping (Seth's legendary volvo is on its last breath--two considerable break downs and repairs in the past few months.). We talk about all these "grown up" things like what we want for our first family car. What?! but it's exciting, of course. Our three choices after last night (the Cooper parents joined in for the shopping) are the Toyota Matrix, Mazda 3 hatchback, and the Prius. I think the Prius we drove last night is the top runner, but we'll see what happens.

Then we went to Beaujos Pizza with Mom and Dad, and Dad and Seth split a Cajun meat pizza (no red onions or jalepenos on Seth's side) while Mom and I split some pizza with artichokes. We talked about the wedding, and about the dress and how it's a kind of (and this might be a stretch I don't know) microcosm for the marriage. It's interesting to me so I'm going to write about it:

The issue of entitlement that brides face (and with car shopping I am very aware that I feel just as entitled to things as the next person) comes up with the dress....the fact that one can spend as much as one wants to to have "THE DRESS" just as one can have the PERFECT MAN. I'm coming to realize that the fact that you shop around for either is kind of weird. Seth's really good and insightful about this: you commit to the one you're with, no shopping around, no looking around, no dating around. There are no dress soul mates as there are no human soul mates. But in writing this, I am finding that I feel kind of silly comparing a dress to a human relationship. I think it'd be more appropriate to view the dress as something kind of insignificant. Because it kind of is. Who really cares what kind of dress you have? Isn't it just another thing the wedding business tells us, or advertising in general, "stick out, be unique, be an individual!"

WRONG.

it's something I struggle with, and if this entry is any indication in it's crazy disarray, I am trying to figure it all out, but I don't have all the answers. I know that 1. the dress is nothing 2. but if you want to make the comparison, you could say that you can approach commitment to a car, a house, a dress, and a husband in the same way.

Anyways, the casserole is done, and I am disappointed with this post but I know a way to redeem it. A poem by Jame Kenyon called "Otherwise"

I got out of bed

on two strong legs.

It might have been

otherwise. I ate

cereal, sweet

milk, ripe, flawless

peach. It might

have been otherwise.

I took the dog uphill

to the birch wood.

All morning I did

the work I love.

At noon I lay down

with my mate. It might

have been otherwise.

We ate dinner together

at a table with silver

candlesticks. It might

have been otherwise.

I slept in a bed

in a room with paintings

on the walls, and

planned another day

just like this day.

But one day, I know,

it will be otherwise.

the knot says: 128 more days to go

I have nothing important to write about. I am just trying to get through this first week back at school, after which, I hope to have more to say.

But since most of the save the dates have been sent out, I thought I could write more about the wedding plans.

Our colors are grey and yellow. I think grey is such a gorgeous color. I got the idea when I saw this color palette on The Bride's Cafe:

The grey that the bridesmaid dresses turned out to be is more light and silvery, but still beautiful. I don't think I'm really drawn towards colors, and both Seth and I wanted a country-like wedding so there's going to be a lot of neutrals: think dried grasses, brown twigs, and the like. Really the only color during the ceremony will be in the bouquets.

I got this idea from this wedding featured on the Bride's Cafe:

Their bouquets are so amazing. Okay, what else?

Susan at Palmer Flowers suggested that I have tiny wild looking ocidium orchids to add more wildness to my bouquet. I'm really excited to see how they will look.

And we are also having these craspedia flowers in some of the arrangements:

And all of this will take place here:

At my parent's house; we will all dance in that barn. I took this picture in October 2008, and I am hoping for an equally incredible evening sky.

More later, now it's time for more school.

the start of my spring semester 2010

Goodmorning, and here it begins.

But, Seth just surprised me this morning by stopping by (Julian gave away the surprise...he knows the sound of his car) for a quick moment and to drop off a little note and card with The Holy Women at the Tomb.


He is so encouraging. I love him.

shouldn't i be done by now? or [this is the way my brain thinks] or "Scattered"

I start school tomorrow and I have the usual anxieties that I experience when starting a new semester. I am taking figure drawing which is going to be another shock to my system. It's going to be really so tough. And besides that I have 17 credits, work, and a wedding to prepare for. I know that I can handle it, but I wonder if taking one of my 3 credit courses during summer might be a better idea. School seems to set up individuals to lead a life of continued frazzledness (is that a word, obviously not.), sleep deprived students, and stress. This is why I don't think it's a bad thing to take your time finishing school, to find a good pace, to take a consistent 15 or less credits? BUT I am conflicted because I also feel like, "but she can do it [take 17 hours and work on top of that]--I'm just a slacker." I'm just torn and then I start to go down this terrible cycle where I feel worthless for having "wasted" nearly three years of my life in Michigan and Nebraska. (Now, I know I didn't, for they were some of my greatest years where I met some of my most favorite people, and I wouldn't have gotten to hang out with Seth on that sunny June day if I hadn't taken that Colorado summer vacation.... but I can't help feel like I SHOULD BE DONE WITH SCHOOL BY NOW.)
But these thoughts get me no where. I have to remember, I'm still only 22, and I have time. I am doing something I like, or that I will like (I still wonder why I have to take a figure drawing class when I am a photography major, but I am just being stubborn.).

And then there's Seth. He's going to be working and I'm going to be going to school...how does this work? Is it going to work? How much part time will I be working? There are so many unknowns, that are quite frankly, terrifying, at times. But it is during these times that I am reminded at how perfect (I know no one's perfect but Seth is pretty great ;) he is. He refocuses my attention at what really matters; the saying I am trying to stamp in my brain is, "We're not a part of that story." Which means, worrying about money, about the uncontrollable future, the unknown is not the story we need to buy into, though it is such a temptation. It is this fear that is taught to us; that if we're not "successful" or making money that life is just rough and stressful and "not good."

but

"We're not a part of that story."

We'll work to be the best we can be, we will rely on something Higher than money to be comforted.

These are things I need to work on and need encouragement with, but, i don't know, even with writing it out, I feel some sort of Peace.

Happy Monday, Happy CSU, Happy Week, everyone.

The 1st of June

We're flying to Boston!

I know that the poll is still up and running on the wedding website but we have made our honeymoon plans. We're going east and staying for a majority of the time in Vermont.

I was intrigued when I saw a yahoo article about "greatest fall drives" and Vermont was included in the list. Granted, we won't be there in the fall, but I figure those changing leaves come from beautiful lush green trees that bloom in the spring and thrive in the summer. When we started initial research we read about farm stays and this was very appealing (gathering your own eggs for breakfast?? yes!!)

So we'll be staying for a night at Shepherd's Hill Farm as well as a weekend of our ten day trip at the Apple Butter Inn. Seth's parents took there honeymoon to the east coast and stayed at the Inn, and try to visit frequently, so it was nice to get our handwritten confirmation letter back with "give our regards to your parents" written near the bottom.

We'll be staying in this room:

Spending some time at Nantucket:

And in Woodstock, Vt:

Happy Weekend: next weekend, homework.

Let's Talk about BRidezilla

The other week my mom and sister, Lacey, were at the mercy of one of my rants. I really appreciate them listening and not getting (visibly, least) annoyed by me.

We landed on the subject of stressful weddings: discontented brides, bossy mother of the brides (i heard from my photographer friend that these can sometimes be the worst to deal with), absent grooms, and all the other stereotypical figures.

Grooms and Brides don't have to behave like this. Just because it seems to be the accepted and expected norm, doesn't mean it's the "right."

While I was living at home this summer, I would guiltily watch TLC's show Bridezillas. I think I just was amazed, shocked, and disgusted by their behaviors...I could only watch enough of the show before becoming really overwhelmed by these people.

This is where I begin my rant. The whole problem is this culture's obsession with entitlement. (big deep breath)

okay, who gave the bride "the right" to be a mean, rude, and inconsiderate child on the wedding day. where does this come from?? Our culture BUYS into ideas (we're going back to American consumerism with this topic) like: "You [the bride] needs to look perfect, buy this to look like that. You need to stress out about seating arrangements and a flawless reception, so buy a wedding planner. You need to have a cocktail hour, you need a big cake, you need beautiful flowers, you need a beautiful hall, china, you need to be the princess, this is YOUR day. It's all about YOU."
seriously? And this obsession with pleasing the customer (ourselves) can only lead to the weddings that are so commercialized and disposable. Like anything one buys, it can all be forgotten and thrown away. How far away from the purpose of marriage can these be?

quick look at consumerism:
Think of going into a coffee shop or any chain restaurant; since I worked for a couple years at Starbucks I'm going to use them as an example. There is a specific way to make a latte, there are recipes, why? because people go to Starbucks because they expect to have the same drink made every time--THEIR drink made right every time (I can't tell you how many times a woman with big dark glasses would come in and just stare at me, fully expecting that I knew "her drink"). And from working in such a place, I know, if THEIR drink isn't right, then they have every "right" to get angry and foul. How can this be that people feel they have a higher standing over another because they paid money, enough of a status to embarrass, harass, and misbehave towards the one who is serving them. We weren't given rights to have consistent coffee, just as we weren't given any rights to a "Bride's day."

Now, i'm not saying that buying things for the wedding is bad, and i'm not excluding myself from this greedy culture, but i am trying my hardest to pay attention to the temptations that exist for brides and grooms (they participate by being passive and dismissive during the preparations...and oftentimes, people encourage this behavior by not including grooms in the wedding planning and through ball and chain imagery, etc.) and forbid myself from subjecting those I love to the consequences of consuming and greed (pouting, bossing, yelling, put downs, disappointment).

I feel it's so important to be conscious of the tendency towards entitlement. I feel that it's when I start thinking, "hey but I need that really gorgeous 3,000 dollar dress (it baffles me that it's common to spend this much on a dress--i could go on an entire tangent on the dress and how it also relates to this discussion), i deserve to have everything go my way, i have the right to have these things or those things or whatever, bla bla bla." that the whole focus is thrown off. As I said to Lacey and Mom, "I don't have "the right" to "fall in love" or get married. what inherently gives us the right to get married? do I really have any rights?" I don't really deserve anything, but I am blessed and forever grateful for a man who has made a commitment to me and I to him, and I am blessed and forever grateful for my parents who want to help celebrate with us and in doing so give food and drink and celebration back to the community and friends and family who gave it to us in the first place.

and I'm very lucky that Seth is making the wedding favors, and i'm so thankful that we're going to have the reception at my parent's home, and that my far a way friends are coming for the festivities (i love you all so so so much), and that my roommate, sister-in-laws, and mother-in-law are doing our cakes, and that there's wheat, and that the table linens don't match.


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
i think this is a beautifully true looking wedding.


look at this: http://thebridescafe.com/?postID=382&real-wedding-cori-rollie

theirs always sticks out to me.

In Detail. THIS IS SOOOOO LONG

I've written or spoken in parts about the proposal, whether it be in my journal, to friends, through pictures, or at the wedding website, but these are usually condensed versions for whatever reason...I don't really know why I haven't written about it completely, perhaps it's because I get so frustrated when I try to write about how great it was and then consequentially feel that, due to my writing ability, I didn't convey just how great it was. But I will try.

So this entry is probably more for me--there will be lots of details that might seem insignificant to the story but, for me, they are are the threads that string one sentence to another, one conversation to another, one song to another, and one landscape to another, until we found ourselves engaged.

It was Labor Day weekend and Seth and I both had monday off so we decided it would be a perfect weekend to go visit Culbertson, Nebraska as we had been meaning to do since summertime. You see, my Grandma and Grandpa Butherus had a farm in Culbertson that also seemed to me my second home. I loved it there, and I loved them. Grandma, however, passed in October 2007, and Grandpa joined her in March 2009. During this past summer I realized it was going to be my first summer not visiting the Farm. This saddened me tremendously and Seth and I decided that our first open weekend we'd travel to Nebraska. However summer 2009 was so busy and the trip didn't happen until Labor Day weekend.

It was a sunday, and it started very early. (* I don't know if I should say it here that I had dreamt that night that Seth proposed but something was different about the ring--like maybe he didn't have a ring or maybe it was a different kind of gem or something...and it happened while all his family was around. anyways....) I made sure to bring some quotes from All the Pretty Horses that I had been meaning to lay at my grandparents' grave for quite sometime. Seth brought a few cds that he'd made for our daytrip. Seth and I both have a certain sentimental and nostalgic love for Nebraska as both our mother's parents had/have farms in Nebraska--this is actually something that we connected on when we first started talking with each other. But Seth had never seen the Farm I grew up loving, so to me, it was already going to be a special day.

We started the trip listening to a cd Seth made (he always makes the best mix cds) that was entitled something like "songs I would have given if I were in love at 17" (alot of old but lovely love songs). And immediately the drive was a beautiful experience. We always say that we experience the most beautiful things together, and this morning was no different. The entire drive up until Imperial/Enders, NE was one through thick fog. The sun had just risen and it was only peeking through the grayish green fog that seemed to change colors with the different landscapes we went past. gah! it was so amazing. Then after "songs I would have given" came Seth's Nebraska album: Hem's "Rabbit Songs" which was so appropriate for the tranquil and lonely roads we traveled. He then started talking to me about something he'd read in Blood Meridian by Cormac McCarthy about how our individual lives are like multiple threads that are going through a ring only to meet through this ring and go out the other side as one. This conversation hinted towards the proposal but I had no idea.

Then we got to Culbertson; we stopped at the K Store for a break before going to the farm. My grandparent's neighbors now own the farm (which is such a blessing since we know and trust them with the farm) so we were going to have to go knock on their door and ask if we could look around; this made me very nervous--things were just so different. So to take up some time we drove up north of the farm to a place we used to call "The Other Place." It is where my grandma grew up, but now all that remains in a basement full of junk and a storm cellar that my cousin, Dustin, sister, Lacey, and I discovered to still have canned beans and soup. Seth and I looked around...it's a pretty eerie place but it's also pretty neat. We found a disgustingly huge spider guarding the storm cellar. Since it was probably private property (I don't know who it belongs to now) we decided to go to the farm. We knocked and Lynn came to the door-- fully expecting us. My mom had called to let her know we would be stopping by. So she gave us a tour of the house and then let me take Seth around the farm. I showed him the barn, the brooder house which used to hold our rabbits, ducks, and chickens, and then over the tiny bridge to the horse (now cow) arenas, and finally by the "tack room" (where we kept the riding equipment) and "kitty house" (which is now full of chickens). It was in this area that I spent most of my time as a kid and teenager: saddling horses, playing with kittens, and caring for lambs. I was looking all around when Seth pulled me by the arm, closer to where he was standing by the kitty house.

"Come here, I want to talk about something....(maybe that's what he said...I think I started getting excited). You know we've been talking about you and me having all these different experiences that meet at a certain point? And I know that this place was so special to you, and I also know that we might not have anymore experiences together here, but I thought it would be the perfect place to ask you to marry me." (again...i think this is terribly paraphrased...and it frustrates me greatly...it's like I can feel exactly what was said, but when it comes down to writing it down or retelling it, I say it all wrong) But of course he barely had time to say "marry me?" that I gasped, threw my arms around his neck, and sobbed. During this embrace, all I could perceive was a great silence around us that was coupled both with my weeping and the gentle sound of chicken clucks. Also during this peaceful, beautiful moment, the clouds which had been so dense and grey, suddenly cleared (no joke) enough to show a pocket of blue, and enough to let a ray of sun shine.

It was so perfect, but then he reached in his pocket for a maroon box, which he opened and said, "this was your grandma's ring." (insert...more sobs) and I saw: the perfect ring. So of course, we hugged and kissed and cried some more and looked some more around the farm.

But it was strange. When I recall the time we had at the farm, after he'd proposed, and after we'd seen all the farm's "monuments," I felt no real longing to stay. I was ready to move on. Maybe, all my experiences on the farm were leading up to that moment, so that I would finally be able to say: "The farm and my grandparent's love was such a special, perfect thing, with so so many good memories. Now, I have am ready to recognize their value in my life but I am ready to let them be a gorgeous memory: the love that they gave will encourage and remind me to build that sort of home for my family. I am ready to build "the Farm" (where ever we land) with Seth."

So then we went to McCook, NE which is the city 10 miles east of Culbertson; it has a walmart and restaurants so we decided to get a bite to eat, drive around the city (since I have just as many memories there as in Culbertson), and get some flowers for the grave.

At the cemetery we laid the flowers and the quotes and spent sometime there. I knew it might be the last time I would be there for quite sometime, so it was pretty emotional besides the obvious reasons.

Then we drove back home, with a beautiful evening and sunset to guide us back. We arrived at my mom and dad's, told them the news (which they were fully expecting, since Seth had to get the ring from my mom, who had had to ask all her sisters if it was alright if I'd have it), then drove to Seth's parents and told them.

Okay? What else? Oh yeah, on the way home I started feeling a sharp pain in my stomach which I attributed to the taco bell we'd eaten, but after consulting with the Forwood/Stoddard family I concluded I had a parasite that caused terrible stomach pain for a week and a half after...funny, huh? My friend Ashley called it my new pet.

What an awkward end to such a beautiful proposal, right?

whatevs.

:)

Like I Said Before...

After being engaged for four months, I still am under the idea that wedding planning is really fun. Who says it has to be stressful? I haven't felt it yet.

I understand though that once May rolls around, I might worry a bit about the weather ;) But I am determined to remember this time of preparation as also a time of celebration. I mean, it's still five months away and we have the church, reception site (Mommy and Daddy's house), save the dates (need to be put in the mail), invitations ordered, flowers picked out, centerpieces (donated by Seth's Grammie), most of the attire, catering, dj (cousin, Dustin and my ipod), and cake. "I'm so freaking excited."

But, it's when I become consumed in the details and expectations of modern weddings that I try to refocus. Seth and I are trying to be careful that our wedding won't give a false or shallow representation of our marriage. While we listen to each other's ideas (i feel this is very important to point out since it really really really bothers me when a wedding is thought of as "the bride's day")we try to examine each facet of the wedding so that each part and detail will be meaningful.

To further explain, "Preparing for Christian Marriage" says: "Honest joy over the covenant of marriage will be festive but not manic." Which exemplifies exactly what we'd like the "big day" to be like--a huge celebration (get ready for games and glow sticks.) For, what we are trying to be is, "The wise couple [who] will view [our] wedding day, and the rituals that surround it, as the portal through which [we] will pass into [our] new world of married life together, a day that symbolically establishes the tone for the kind of life [we] hope to share." I love that "Preparing" even specifically says, "Eating good food and rejoicing in song and dance are important ways to express a community's joy....When Jesus offers his disciples an image of God's gracious community, he uses the image of a wedding banquet where all are welcome."

It is even said that, "We ought to bring out our best for our wedding receptions as a way to express the hospitality of Christian marriage." BUT (and here is the brilliant distinction), "We should take care not to fall into a "market-driven" definition of what is our best." This means, our best does not equal giving into the usual temptations to spend excessively, but that "our best comes from who we are together, and what we have to give."

With that said, I do want to share some ideas that I have for the reception that I just found today. I check The Bride's Cafe and Once Wed daily; not only are they creative, but the photography is always incredible (for those who don't know, photography is my major at CSU). Anyways, I love the idea of having chalkboards for the menu (easy, right?); and a clothesline of old family portraits is a special, simple, and lovely tribute to the ones who have showed us and continue to show us what love is.

Alright. I realize that this is long-- and maybe nonsensical, but I've cleaned kitchens and bathrooms all day and I'm not thinking well. excuses excuses.

Next time: my ideas on the obsession with entitlement.

Happy Tuesday evening!

To begin, some quotes.

This is Brooke, and I am getting married to Seth James Forwood on May 29th, 2010. I feel that besides our "wedding website page" that a blog could be a nice way for us to share our journey through marriage and life with our community, especially when some of our closest friends and family live furthest away....

I imagine posting occasionally with readings from our favorite authors, thoughts, plans for our future (which will admittedly include wedding plans at first), and eventually videos, and pictures, and stories about our growing family.

I am so excited about our future. I'm so thankful there are so many people we have to share it with.

To begin this blog, I have been itching to share some quotes from the essay (is it an essay, Seth?) "Preparing for Christian Marriage" by John McFadden and David McCarthy. I feel the following show exactly where Seth and I are coming from when we announce to the public on May 29th, that we are "married."

This essay explains thoroughly how marriage should work, and what its purpose should be.

1. "a heathy marriage is understood as enabling a husband and wife to offer deeper and richer gifts to the wider community than they could ever do individually."

2. "Marriage in this sense is counter-cultural in a society so thoroughly steeped in individualism, for it is centered in the conviction that we have given ourselves to a relationship that is more important than our individual wants and wishes.....Such a healthy marriage offers an alternative to a consumerist, individualist world, insofar as it puts into action the possibility of a deeper, more gracious way of life."

I feel that these two quotes outline entirely the purpose of marriage and what Seth and I will be living, together, for.

Ack....I have gotten carried away and I haven't even explained myself, but I have to go to work.

I am sure this will continue, maybe with discussions about submission, compromise, and "freedom."

Anyways, excuse my brief parting when I say: have a blessed day

much more later.