Sunday Morning

This might be my favorite Sunday morning I've had in a while. It's something about Sundays that gets me anxious and irritated; it's probably because I'm anticipating the Monday ahead.

But not today. I woke up relatively early, 7:30am, which is always a good thing because it means I can fill the time before I go to church with good things. Instead of just "getting ready," I am at this very moment, eating Vanilla Island Kashi cereal, drinking really good, smokey, dark, coffee, listening to Feist, and smelling the starts of my summer squash casserole sizzle in the frying pan.

Seth and I are going to church at Christ our Hope Anglican Church as of late, and today there is a potluck, hence the casserole. But this is what I like: making food, taking my time in the morning, and getting an early start.

I feel like I'm growing...up?

Even last night we went car shopping (Seth's legendary volvo is on its last breath--two considerable break downs and repairs in the past few months.). We talk about all these "grown up" things like what we want for our first family car. What?! but it's exciting, of course. Our three choices after last night (the Cooper parents joined in for the shopping) are the Toyota Matrix, Mazda 3 hatchback, and the Prius. I think the Prius we drove last night is the top runner, but we'll see what happens.

Then we went to Beaujos Pizza with Mom and Dad, and Dad and Seth split a Cajun meat pizza (no red onions or jalepenos on Seth's side) while Mom and I split some pizza with artichokes. We talked about the wedding, and about the dress and how it's a kind of (and this might be a stretch I don't know) microcosm for the marriage. It's interesting to me so I'm going to write about it:

The issue of entitlement that brides face (and with car shopping I am very aware that I feel just as entitled to things as the next person) comes up with the dress....the fact that one can spend as much as one wants to to have "THE DRESS" just as one can have the PERFECT MAN. I'm coming to realize that the fact that you shop around for either is kind of weird. Seth's really good and insightful about this: you commit to the one you're with, no shopping around, no looking around, no dating around. There are no dress soul mates as there are no human soul mates. But in writing this, I am finding that I feel kind of silly comparing a dress to a human relationship. I think it'd be more appropriate to view the dress as something kind of insignificant. Because it kind of is. Who really cares what kind of dress you have? Isn't it just another thing the wedding business tells us, or advertising in general, "stick out, be unique, be an individual!"

WRONG.

it's something I struggle with, and if this entry is any indication in it's crazy disarray, I am trying to figure it all out, but I don't have all the answers. I know that 1. the dress is nothing 2. but if you want to make the comparison, you could say that you can approach commitment to a car, a house, a dress, and a husband in the same way.

Anyways, the casserole is done, and I am disappointed with this post but I know a way to redeem it. A poem by Jame Kenyon called "Otherwise"

I got out of bed

on two strong legs.

It might have been

otherwise. I ate

cereal, sweet

milk, ripe, flawless

peach. It might

have been otherwise.

I took the dog uphill

to the birch wood.

All morning I did

the work I love.

At noon I lay down

with my mate. It might

have been otherwise.

We ate dinner together

at a table with silver

candlesticks. It might

have been otherwise.

I slept in a bed

in a room with paintings

on the walls, and

planned another day

just like this day.

But one day, I know,

it will be otherwise.